Though he was universally regarded as the stupidest man in history, no one actually bothered to tell Ted Smith and he managed to lead an illustrious life – forming numerous groundbreaking mathematical theories and discovering a new elementary particle – before someone told him what an idiot he was. The downtrodden Smith was forced to admit that his many unprecedented scientific advances must have been dumb luck, and he spent the last few years of his life alone on a park bench, picking his nose and eating it.